at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
