i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
