I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
