I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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