I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
