So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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