I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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