I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
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