Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
