i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize
