I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
