The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
