am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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