chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
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