For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
