Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
