Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
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