Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
