carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
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