i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
