I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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