You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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