after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Randomize
