I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
