these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Randomize
