Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
