Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
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