If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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