Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Randomize
