I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
