Where is the hickey?
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
