Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize