I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
You are the jesus of drinking
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
