You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Randomize
