so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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