Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
