You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
