You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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