How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
