dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
