there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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