He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
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