Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
How's work?
Spinning.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
