Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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