THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
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