she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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