i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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