Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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