We should be called the Road Head Warriors
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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