i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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